i'm seeing my self control losing things physically much more than just money and time,
i almost fell asleep at a bus shelter last Saturday night,
the most reckless behavior again.
this has to be the last weekend i really look for an excuse, because a savior will not show up, with a voice yelling on the street.
not everyone is your friend, not anymore at least, you've asked them to take a step outside your circle.
so that i may actually start judging the balances, weigh out who really has anything for me in mind.
because i'm starting to see myself unimportant, unessesntial in relation to others,
do i really need that satisfaction of entertainment? to be enthralled by others? i go and karaoke when i am need of attention. when that is fufilled, i become satiated for the moment, for the week, at least.
and by occasion i can be summoned, but i have to start following my rule of being only summoned when i plan, on the sunday prior.
it just isnt fair to my care and well-being.
i gotta go to the doctor and probably start really look at my agenda better, because there's nothing i've planning besides that of my entertainment, nothing of value for myself yet.
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